Wasn't Going To, But...

It is Sunday. I am alone, on my knees. Staring at Jesus' pained body hanging on the cross.

I wanted to scream. I did not want to hurt any more. "Why, God?" Why must I bear this pain, shame, darkness? I do not think I am supposed to feel this way? Why can I not just go through life happily like everyone else?

I felt a firm, but loving command to be quiet.

Stared and stared at the cross. Parishioners filing out to my left and right. Letting the organ music wash over me. Tears started welling up. Out of no where. I let them come. I welcomed them like the old friends they were.

"Tell everyone."

"Everyone, Lord?"

"Everyone."

"In the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit. Amen."